


And If I'm Sinnin' Then It Feels Like Heaven To Me

by MrSpider945



Series: Modern Stuff - Six: The Musical [7]
Category: Six - Marlow/Moss
Genre: Other, this is angstier than the last one y'all i'm sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-12
Updated: 2019-10-12
Packaged: 2020-12-13 18:13:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21002012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrSpider945/pseuds/MrSpider945
Summary: In which Catherine lets her feelings out, even if it is to be seen by no one but herself.





	And If I'm Sinnin' Then It Feels Like Heaven To Me

**Author's Note:**

> Title Inspiration- Sinners by Lauren Aquilina
> 
> so i fell in love with the idea of the queens writing letters to their past selves lhdgjkdfkjghdlkjgdshkj anyways yee enjoy!!!
> 
> Trigger Warnings- None that I can think of, but as always, just ask me and I'll put them

_ Dear Catalina, _

_ This is going to be incredibly messy, _ <strike> _ hich _ </strike> _ which is not what you deserve, but please _ <strike> _ jut _ </strike> _ just bear with me. A really big realization just hit me and I think you deserve to know what’s happening. _

_ You’re hurting yourself a lot right now, my dear. I know you’re imprisoned, and you think it’ll bring you closer to God, but it won’t. It’ll only hurt you in the long run, and you’ve got enough in _ <strike> _ stre _ </strike> _ store as is. _

_ It’ll look like it got better in a while- _ <strike> _ sven _ </strike> _ seven years, to be more _ <strike> _ accutate _ </strike> _ accurate. You’ll be marrying Henry, Arthur’s brother. It is weird, I agree, but it’ll happen. But, he won’t be the best of husbands. You won’t realize that until much, much later, though. _

_Honestly, neither _<strike>_this I_</strike>_ did I. I _<strike>_jut re_</strike> _jsut__ just realized it myself, in all fairness. But he’ll hurt you. Don’t trust a _**_word_**_ of what he says. Don’t trust him as a rule. He isn’t worth it._

_ Please, _ ** _please_ ** _ try to remember that Anne didn’t have a choice either. I know she’s going to do a lot of things that will anger you beyond belief, but she’d being _ <strike> _ mesed _ </strike> _ messed over just as much as you are. Offer her help. I understand you won’t have much of a choice, but be kind to her, as much as you can. _

_ Same thing for Bessie. Remember, she’s just a child when he starts going after her. She deserved better, and while I couldn’t do anything to help her, maybe you can. _

<strike> _ You _ </strike> _ We weren’t at fault. None of us. You don’t know it yet, but Henry ends up having four more wives after you and Anne. Jane Seymour, Anna of Cleves, Katherine Howard and Catherine Parr- the _ _ l<strike>astest of</strike> _ _ latest of which being your _ <strike> _ futur god _ </strike> _ future goddaughter. You won’t get to meet her until later, though. Much, much later, after you’ve died for the first time. _

_ If you can, though, try to watch out for her. She’ll need all the help she can get. She didn’t deserve any of what happened to her. _

_ You’ll have a lot of miscarriages and stillborn _ <strike> _ chilldren _ </strike> _ children. It’ll hurt, in more ways than one. In the end, _ <strike> _ you’re _ </strike> _ your only living child will be your fifth. Her name will be Mary, and she’ll be the light of your life. Please, _ ** _please_ ** _ , spend as much time as you can with her. That time will be limited regardless of what happens, so enjoy it while you can. And make sure she knows you love her, please. _

_ Do the same for Maria. I know you miss her, and just thinking about her hurts. But _ <strike> _ you will _ </strike> _ she will be _ <strike> _ the _ </strike> _ your greatest source of _ <strike> _ spport _ </strike> _ support later down the line. She’d do anything for you- _ <strike> _ trus _ </strike> _ you’ll understand in due time. _

_You’ll end up _<strike>_imprisioned_</strike>_ imprisoned again at the end of your life. Henry will divorce you for Anne. I’m so sorry you have to go through that, mí corázon. Just __<strike>rmemeber</strike>, not_ _just__ remember, none of it __was your fault__ will be your fault._

_ I wish you didn’t have to go through what you will. I wish you didn’t have to marry Henry, I wish you had more time with Mary, I wish you didn’t have to act the way you will have to towards Anne _ <strike> _ abd Bessi _ </strike> _ and Bessie, I wish you and Maria could have more times, I wish for so many things, but at the _ _ nd of the day _ _ end of the day wishing can’t change anything. _

_ So I’ll _ _ I have only today realized just how traumatic my past _ _ live _ _ life was. _ _ Which _ _ I’m writing this to you to _ _ ward _ _ warn you of everything, in hopes it’ll help you cope _ <strike> _ wth _ </strike> _ with it all. _

_ Remember, it wasn’t your fault. No matter what they throw at you, never forget that. _

_ Te amo, mi corazón, _

_ Catherine of Aragon. _


End file.
